Love Him
by ChosenOfAshurha
Summary: Belle doesn't know if she wants to salvage their relationship, leaving Rumplestiltskin devastated at the well. He wanders through the woods to the only friend he has left - Jefferson, his former employee and lover - in search of even the barest support. Instead, he finds comfort in the love between them that never faded.


Walking through Storybrooke alone and exposed felt strange. Gone. Belle was gone. Hadn't he been doing everything right? He'd risked his life to save hers, even when she'd walked away. He made a selfless deal for Merida's heart. He'd battled Hook without magic and won - though he knew that was the dark one's plan, somehow. Whatever Hook was after, it wasn't a proper battle. He could have killed him instantly.

All his fears, faced. He was open. Honest. Everything Belle asked him to be - Rumple was the hero she craved and deserved, wasn't here? Baby steps were key, and he knew she wouldn't rush into his arms at once, but hadn't she promised that it wasn't too late?

But it was. It was far too late for them.

His legs carried him blindly through Storybrooke's roads, to the far edges of the town. Rumple needed… he wasn't entirely sure, honestly. I needed something, someone, anyone who'd listen to him. Without Belle, he felt truly and utterly alone.

Rumplestiltskin found himself staring before a large, lavish manor, almost intimidatingly modern. His last friend in town, Jefferson, might welcome him. They hadn't spoken since the first curse, the curse that brought them there, but he freed Belle.

Jefferson remembered.

Sighing, Rumple raised his hand and rang the doorbell.

* * *

"... Rumple," Jefferson breathed, staring at the worn frame of his closest friend. He'd finally aged. Greying, soft hair that pooled against his shoulders, extra lines around his large brown eyes, healthy weight… It was strange seeing him so human, and so close. Many times Jefferson spied on him. Many times the lense of his telescope was pointed at Rumple's shop.

Not that he'd ever tell him.

"Jefferson, may I come in? Please, I need - I need someone to listen."

"My door is always open to you. Come in, come in."

He made room for Rumple to enter and closed the door behind him. He looked so… Broken. It didn't feel right to Jefferson.

"What's wrong? I can read you like a book, Rumple; something's happened."

"Belle," Rumple whispered, lowering himself down on Jefferson's plush sofa. "Belle's left me. I don't know how active you are in keeping up with the town, but they pulled the curse out of me. I'm just a man now. Mortal. Without the curse, though, I was dying. It nearly consumed me. I was in… I was in a suspended state, a sort of coma, for weeks. Emma brought me back."

Jefferson sat beside him, a frown tugging at his lips. Coma? He hadn't heard. If he'd known, he would have been there by his side.

"So why'd Belle leave?"

"Oh, we're not there yet, dearie," Rumple laughed."It's a bit of a long story. I lied to her. I tried to free myself from the dagger after… After a rather trying time. It put her friends in danger, and I understand why she'd still be upset. But Jefferson, I've done so much. So much good where Belle is concerned. I've never coerced her or forced her to do something she didn't want to. I gave her space whenever she asked. I got her heart back and encouraged her to be with Will - "

Jefferson held up his hand, cutting off Rumple's speech.

"Will? Scarlett?"

"Yes. When she banished me, they began a relationship."

"... That's not fair. What about Will's true love? Hell, what about Belle's? Why would they move on so quickly?"

Shrugging, Rumple leaned back on the sofa. "I have no idea. I don't know him, I don't know the state of his heart, but I know I couldn't stand the whelp. But I didn't hurt him. We got her heart back, together, and I left. I was dying, Jefferson, I just wanted her to be safe and happy. When I woke, she seemed so happy. So happy to see me, if cautious. And I understand! I do! But she said that it was never too late. She supported me. She helped me find my strength, and when Hook challenged me I asked her to meet me by the well if she wanted to work through all the things we've never had time to. If I lived, of course."

"The well where you were married," Jefferson mused. "You always were a hopeless romantic, Rumple. Ferocious dark one reputation, but a kitten on the inside." He smiled gently, hoping to see it mirrored on Rumple's lips.

He couldn't find the heart to smile in return.

"She came. For a brief moment I thought - I thought she wanted to be with me. Do you know what she said to me?"

"Something horrible, I imagine."

"She said she loved me, but she didn't know if she wanted to make this work."

Rumple's resolve broke. His lips trembled as he dug his fingers into his thighs. Tears welled in his deep brown eyes, obscuring Jefferson in his vision. He was falling apart, but he didn't ask for Jefferson's comfort.

Jefferson wondered if it was because he was so used to being alone.

"Rumple…"

"Everyone I love leaves," he whispered, lowering his head. "Everyone I open myself to abandons me. My father. Milah. Cora. Belle. Hell, even my mother passed - probably to get away from me." Rumple managed a choked, sarcastic little laugh. "I can't keep doing this. I can't keep fighting. I've lost everything. I've lost my wife, my son…"

"Not everyone." Before Rumple could object Jefferson joined him, wrapping an arm around his shoulder and pulling him close. "I'm still here. Alright? I'm not going anywhere. I know I've been busy raising Grace, and keeping out of the savior's nonsense, but you have me. You will **always** have me, Rumple."

* * *

He was right. Rumple turned his head, looking at him with a horrible ache in his heart. Jefferson had always been there. No matter how quiet they'd kept their closeness, no matter what new curse or villain or creature came to rip the town apart, he'd had Jefferson. Of all the people to flit in and out of Rumpelstiltskin's life, Jefferson had stayed.

Jefferson was the only person he could truly count on.

Rumple reached up and gently touched Jefferson's chest. His fingers slid down his lapel, the touch light and reserved. He wanted to grab him, to pull him close and crush their mouths together, but he couldn't bring himself to.

If he did, he'd likely lose Jefferson too.

"You're right," he whispered, the tears finally spilling over his cheeks. "You're entirely right. You've been here all along. Busy, but here. Jefferson, you have been better to me than family. I know I'm not the man I used to be - I'm not the dark one - but if you would have my friendship…"

Truthfully Rumple wanted more, but he knew it was far too soon. His broken heart longed for relief, but Belle had only just left. He didn't want it to seem as if he was using Jefferson, or as if he had ulterior motives. Rumple wasn't looking for a rebound.

Though how long had it taken Belle to date Will?

"Just friendship?"

Shaken from his thoughts by Jefferson's soft question, Rumple searched his face. What? Did Jefferson mean to imply that he wanted… more? After several years of not speaking, of never even catching glimpses of him in town?

"What -"

"You really don't know how much I've missed you, do you?"

Jefferson chuckled and pulled Rumple properly into his arms, turning him so they faced one another as their chests pressed together. With one gentle motion their foreheads touched, and he could feel his breath against his skin.

"... No. I suppose I don't."

"I've been careful to keep Grace away from the danger, yes. I've been keeping an eye on you since the curse broke, Rumple. I let you go because you were happy, but that doesn't mean I stopped loving you."

Rumple managed a weak smile and let his hands slide up Jefferson's chest.

"Nor I you, my dear."

"Is that why never visited?"

"God, when did I have the time? I was always either saving the town, trying to cling to life, or being imprisoned," Rumple laughed. "I always wanted to visit. If I'd found the time, I was so sure you wouldn't want to see me."

"I would never turn you away."

With that, Jefferson pressed their lips together in a slow, soft kiss. Rumplestiltskin melted against him, letting his hands wander to Jefferson's hair. He groaned and parted his lips. Taking his invitation, Jefferson licked into his mouth and pulled him into his lap.

"You have no idea how much I loved watching you age," Jefferson panted, grinning at Rumple. "You were so unchanging back then; gold skin, brown hair, layers and layers of carefully-crafted leather… Seeing you as a man for the first time was nearly overwhelming. So beautiful, Rumple. Your hair, your eyes, your skin - everything about you is beautiful."

"It's been ages since I've heard anything like that," Rumple replied shyly. "You don't mind the grey?"

"Rumple, I love the grey."

* * *

Jefferson's hands slid down the back of his suit jacket, scratching at the material lightly. He never dreamed he'd get to hold Rumple like that again. Their relationship was in the past. All the hunger, the heat, the need he felt wasn't appropriate in Storybrooke.

He slid Rumple's jacket off his shoulders, kissing along the curve of his jaw. Such nice suits… and they were much easier to remove than all the leather and lace he used to wear. The tie came next, sliding loose from Rumple's collar.

"I'm not… It's not the same," Rumple whispered, closing his eyes. "I've changed a lot over the years, Jefferson. I'm not…" He wasn't as lean as he used to be. More scars, more weight, more wrinkles… Jefferson barely looked a day over thirty, even if he wasn't as baby-faced as he used to be. The age between them was finally noticeable.

"That doesn't matter to me. You're gorgeous and you always have been," Jefferson reassured him. "Trust me, Rumple. I've never stopped desiring you."

Scoffing, Rumple raised his eyes to his. "Never?"

"Not once. Not a single day passed where I didn't kick myself for letting you go."

As if to drive the point home Jefferson began unbuttoning Rumple's shirt. His skilled fingers worked quickly, and before Rumple could protest he slid the navy material from his chest.

"Now that's more like it," he breathed, admiring Rumple's pale skin. Weeks of hovering between life and death had done their toll. He'd lost weight, clearly, and being out of the sun had cost his skin its golden glow, but he looked gorgeous. His legs were still toned and trim, from what Jefferson could see beneath his trousers, and he no longer seemed close to starvation. Rumple looked healthy, as healthy as it was possible for him to look.

And his limp was gone. Jefferson noticed that when he rang the bell.

* * *

Despite how familiar it was, and how desperately he craved Jefferson's affections and attentions, Rumple couldn't help but recall the words of the people "closest" to him. He wasn't anything special, and he certainly didn't find himself attractive - not now. Not since Zelena.

"I'm sorry," he whispered instinctively. "I… It's been quite some time since anyone's seen me, and…"

"Do you need me to go slower?" Jefferson asked.

"No. No, please. I need this, Jefferson. I need you. If you go slower I'll, I'll lose what little nerve I have." Rumple's large eyes were pleading; nervous as he was, he truly needed Jefferson. He needed to be cared for, just once. Just once in his miserable life, he needed someone to comfort him.

"Well then. I'll just have to pick up the pace, won't I?"

Smirking, Jefferson pulled his own top layers off and lifted Rumple in his arms. They were still clothed from the waists down but it didn't matter to either of them. He carried Rumple through the halls, until he reached the master bedroom. It was lavish and modern, with a huge bed and a closet the size of Rumple's bathroom.

He'd always had fine tastes.

Rumple touched the mattress gently as Jefferson set him down. While he watched, Jefferson pulled his belt from its loops and stripped his rather form-fitting jeans. It struck Rumple just how more muscular Jefferson appeared; in the forest he was sculpted, yes, but he was also lean. In storybrooke he looked as if he'd been ripping stumps in half with his bare hands. A faint smile touched his lips at the thought. No, his hatter wouldn't be doing any manual labor of that sort. Perhaps he'd just forgotten.

One trembling hand reached forward, his fingertips sliding along Jefferson's muscles. Soft skin. Warm. Strong. He was perfect, and Rumple wondered how he'd ever been able to stay away from him long enough to get anything done.

"Like what you see?"

"Always."

Jefferson smiled down at him and gently pushed Rumple back on the bed. His hands skilfully unbuckled his belt and pulled it free.

"Mind if I take these off?"

"Please do."

With Rumple's permission he pulled his trousers down his thighs. Both in nothing but their pants, Jefferson crawled over him and kissed a trail along Rumple's stomach. Soft moans reached his ears; it'd been far too long since he heard Rumple's low sounds of pleasure.

When he reached his lips Jefferson kissed him, soft and gentle as he walked his fingers along Rumple's arms. Nearly bare beneath him, he looked more vulnerable than Jefferson had ever seen him. It took so much strength to come to his home, so much trust to share this with him…

"Jefferson, I - "

Jefferson cut him off with a deep kiss, distracting Rumple from his nervousness as he slid his pants down his legs. He removed his own as well, letting their skin touch with the barest connection before he pulled back and retrieved a small vial from the nightstand.

"If you want me to stop, Rumple, I will. You remember your command?"

Rumple nodded. A word he'd never say, a word he'd never speak in casual conversation. Dagger.

"Good." Grinning, Jefferson nipped at his lips. He slicked his fingers and let them slip between Rumple's legs, gently rubbing at his muscle. The tension seemed to drain from his body; no longer tensed and ready to flee, Rumple slid one shaking hand through Jefferson's hair and held him close.

As Jefferson worked him open, Rumple moaned and shifted beneath him. His lips were never far, kissing Rumple's jaw, his lips, his throat… Anywhere Jefferson could reach. Time seemed to stretch around them, suspending them in perfect solitude.

"Now," Rumple breathed. "Please, Jefferson. Please…"

* * *

He needed him. With his hands tangled in Jefferson's soft hair, Rumple found it easy to relax. Jefferson, his beautiful thief, still desired him. He still loved him. Someone cared for him - it just so happened that someone was the most stunning man he'd ever laid eyes on. A faint smile touched his lips as he wrapped his legs around Jefferson's waist, waiting for the pressure.

Jefferson pressed into him, slow and gentle just in case. A low moan slipped from his throat and he shifted his hips, trying to fill himself faster. He could take it; it didn't hurt, and Rumple wanted nothing more than to be fucked. Jefferson eased back, clicking his tongue at Rumple's boldness.

"Not yet," he whispered playfully. "That's not what you need just now."

Holding Rumple's hips still, Jefferson filled him at that same slow pace, until he felt Rumple's skin against his own. It wasn't fair. Rumple groaned, looking up at Jefferson with pleading eyes, but Jefferson only smirked in response.

He drew his hips back once more, leaving Rumple moaning softly at the steady slide of his cock. When Jefferson filled him again he tightened around him, eager to tease him in return. That agonizing pace wasn't enough, and Rumple knew that Jefferson was well aware of it. Still, it felt incredible. Rumple held him tighter, letting one hand slide down his back as Jefferson fucked him leisurely. So sedated, so relaxed, they kissed lazily as their bodies rocked together. Rumple still wanted more, but Jefferson's gentle care overwhelmed his need to be consumed.

For a while.

The first rough thrust brought Rumple out of his hazy, pleasured stupor. Gasping, his fingers pressed harder into Jefferson's skin.

"Oh, you tease," he whispered, his eyes rising to meet Jefferson's.

In response he thrust again, hard and quick. A frustrated grunt slipped from Rumple's throat. More. He needed more.

Jefferson grinned and moved faster, abandoning the teasing little snaps of his hips for a more sure pace. Beneath him Rumple tipped his head back against the pillows, hips rolling eagerly. In one quick movement Jefferson grabbed his hands and pinned them near the headboard. Their fingers laced together, a gentle gesture despite the force of his thrusts. Rumple's lips parted in pleasure as Jefferson's cock filled him, again and again in quick succession.

"Good boy," Jefferson panted, his breath hot against Rumple's skin. He knew just what to say to drive Rumple out of his mind. "This is what you wanted, isn't it? To be fucked properly? To be desired?"

"Y-yes," he replied. "Jefferson… Will you touch me?"

"Only if you beg. Let me hear you, Rumple. Let me hear Storybrooke's purest hero begging to be touched."

"Please… Please, touch me," Rumplestiltskin gasped. "Jefferson, I need you! I'll do anything, anything you ask of me, just touch me!" His voice cracked slightly, full of desperation. It was just what Jefferson wanted to hear.

He let go of one of Rumple's hands and wrapped his own around his flushed cock, stroking in time with the rough thrusts of his hips. Rumple was coming undone, back arching, skin covered in sweat as he met every sharp snap of Jefferson's.

"Come for me, Rumple. Show me how much you've missed me."

At Jefferson's command Rumple's hand tightened around his. HIs hips bucked twice before he spilled over Jefferson's hand, gasping his name with ragged breaths. His own stomach was coated with his release, nearly reaching his chest.

"Oh, fuck! Look at you…"

Jefferson grabbed Rumple's hips and buried his cock inside him, holding him in place as his own orgasm filled him.

* * *

Spent and sated he pulled Rumple into his arms, ignoring the mess to smile and press gentle kisses to his face. Jefferson could still taste the sweat on his skin as Rumple smiled up at him, looking soft and radiant in his embrace.

"Are you going to visit me more often, Mr. Gold?"

"Jefferson… Of course I am," Rumple replied. "I didn't… Don't think I came here for sex, or for some sort of rebound. Please, don't. I'm here because I love you. Out of everyone who's come through my life, you are the only who has stayed and supported me. You're my best friend, and the man I love. I've - I know I've not been good about visiting, or about staying in touch, but I'm not the man I used to be. I'm not cursed. You and Grace are in no danger from the darkness. If you'll have me, I will be here."

Jefferson smiled at him, relieved to hear it.

"Good. I don't want to lose you again. If your estranged wife comes by, though, I'm telling her exactly where you are."

Laughing, Rumple shook his head.

"Will your answer be 'tied up at the moment'?"

"That depends on if you've been behaving," Jefferson teased.


End file.
